For planners like myself who try to understand the concept of spontaneity, God's funny side comes out when he places us in specific situations that bring out only the most awkward, most unprepared, and most dramatic reactions. Due to these generally childlike responses, I find myself questioning my age and emotional stability. Many will laugh at my plan to marry a missionary doctor, get a pet llama, and somehow give birth to twins, while many uncomfortably try to give an appropriate response to my weird friend-making approaches. When I meet a new person, I instantly figure out why we would be good friends and then formulate a step by step process on how we will become really good friends...yea, weird, but that's how I am wired. I plan everything. Every. Single. Thing. Well as it turns out, God is the director of my tv show life and those plans I have... typically conflict with His picture of what he had in mind for me.
but...
(He meets me where I am at.)
He meets me where I am at. A truth that has stuck with me since I can remember. There have been seasons where I was lost in imagination and mountain air not caring about the next day (Ashlynisms Seasons 2-13), to Seasons where I was tired of all the pressures from the Christian community and just gave up (Ashlynisms Season 15), to Seasons where I loved each and every day (Ashlynisms Season 18), to then Seasons where I made unwise decisions and had to live with the consquences (Ashlynisms Season 20).
In every Season of my TV show life, God has always met me where I am at. As I have fought through camp kid identity issues, getting sucked into a legalistic motivation for life, and making poor choices simply because of curiosity...His patience and love created a safe place for me to mess up and yet be okay with running back into the arms of my Savior.
As I walk through the door every morning, ready to take the day on, I find myself asking God what Episode of this season he has in store for me. I know that he will always be there, will always be #1 fan who eats his popcorn, ready to laugh with the random surprises that get thrown my way. I know He will patiently meet me where I am at as I figure out what it means to walk in the spirit daily, seek to have a heart of obedience, and have a continual desire to learn more about Him.
Who is God to you? What piece of truth has been a huge part of your life seasons?
My God gets me, understands my quirks, and doesn't mind letting me be thrown off my failed plans. I am perfectly fine being that dramatic, predictable, yet out-of-control character in the show because I got an awesome Lord who meets me where I am at, while other onlookers may question my value and worth.
I am intense, vocal, love deep conversations, and get energized from planning. I can be too much for people, too overwhelming, too structured and THANK GOODNESS..my TV show life is unique and special and if people can see Jesus in me, then my heart is happy and I will carry on one Ashlynism season at a time with God as my director.
